I have become obsessed with the idea that I need to win the break up. One can do this by having sex with someone first or starting to date someone first, or simply feeling "over it" first. I am clearly not able to do the latter, so I am stuck with sex and dating.
Granted, its been two months, but I am still full of so much anger, resentment and upset. Even though I did the dumping.
I have been acting out, almost smoking a fags again (having quit almost a year ago), getting more drunk than is good for me, seriously contemplating trying to sleep with E again, and when I am really desperate (ie now) seriously contemplating propositioning a random person for rebound/revenge sex.
I saw some photos on facebook today of him out with his flatmates. It made me burst into tears and contemplate calling him for the first time in five weeks. Now that is really desperate. I am angry with myself for not being over it. I desperately want to be, but it is getting worse lately.
Could it be hormones? Or I am I just that pathetic? I've forgotten completely how to get over someone.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment